“We were just supposed to write a story together…”
In mid-November 2022, I put out a call on Twitter, looking for writing partners. I had this idea of writing the same erotica scene from two points of view, one a male dom and the other a female sub. Instead of writing both voices, I wanted someone else to write the male dom’s POV.
Exactly one person DMed me saying they were interested. W.
We never did write that story, because we ended up being too busy falling in love with each other. W and I, along with my husband Cash, officially began our polyamory journey on February 16, 2023, and we haven’t looked back since. Absolutely not a single regret. Sometimes, I can’t believe this is my life. Having W as my boyfriend is so fulfilling.
Only one problem… he lives several states away.
We’re lucky I guess. He could live in another time zone, on the opposite coast, or on the other side of the world. He doesn’t. But a 10 hour drive is still a lot when you love someone.
I was clear from the start: I don’t want this to be a long-distance thing for the rest of my life. He agreed. And step one to a plan to someday live near one another (if not with one another) is meeting in person for the first time.
Fuck, that is such a scary thing to do.
I was an early adopter of online dating. In fact, I remember back in 2004ish, lying to people about how I met my then-boyfriend because saying we met online raised too many eyebrows. Truth be told, I met most of my boyfriends online. Of course, I met my husband online too. (Funny story, I almost didn’t reply to his message because I thought he lived too far away! Thank goodness I did!)
Along the way, it stopped being super weird, and now a huge percentage of people meet the same way. I probably went out on over 100 first dates with guys I met online over the years I was actively dating. I kissed a lot of frogs… or at least had drinks with them.
But all my online dating experience didn’t make it any less nerve-wracking when I was sitting in my car the Saturday before last, trying not to chew my nails or sweat through my dress as I waited for W to pull into the parking lot beside me.
Y’all. This man drove 10+ hours to meet me.
I must be the luckiest girl in the world, because ohhhhh this man. Hot? Check. Funny? Check. Smart? Check. Thoughtful? Check. Sexy? Check check check check check! He is exactly the person he shows himself to be online.
And he drove 10+ hours to meet me. ME?!
Excuse me while I swoon.
He got out of his car. He gave me the biggest, tightest hug and an extremely thoughtful gift.
And then we kissed.
I was so nervous I was shaking. I felt like I couldn’t think straight. There, in the busy parking lot of a used bookstore, he kissed me so tenderly I thought my heart was going to stop beating.
The following days are a blur to me of total bliss. He met my husband and dog. I gave him a tour of my house. We went out for birthday sushi and Thai food. We visited local game shops and book stores I love. I cooked for him. He read to me. We painted together. We watched our favorite show. We went to the beach and talked about life while digging our toes in the sand and looking out at the waves.
We snuggled and held hands and kissed and had lots of delicious sex. Sometimes giggling and trying to be quiet like teenagers. Sometimes loud with lots of toys. Mostly with deep kisses while he was inside me.
Meeting someone in person after getting to know them on Twitter isn’t something that works out well for most people. It’s awkward and often disappointing. Online flirting sometimes doesn’t translate to real life feelings for both people. All too often, I see people excited to meet, and then equally excited to go their separate ways or even cutting their trip short so they can drive/fly home earlier than originally intended.
That… didn’t happen for us.
Meeting W was like a puzzle piece of my life clicking into place. It felt like a part of my soul was coming home. A 4-5 day trip didn’t feel long enough, and I cried when he left. I am more in love with him now than I was before he visited, something I didn’t know was even possible.
We joke that our motto is: “Poly is weird and hard.”
And it is. We work through challenges like any couple, but now there are more opinions and feelings in the mix as well. It’s super weird. It’s super hard.
But I couldn’t have a better boyfriend to walk this path with me. (And husband, but gushing about him is another story for another day.)
So… the tl;dr version: I met my Twitter crush. We were just supposed to write a story together, and now we get to write the rest of our lives together instead. I’m so lucky.
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